that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
