see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Randomize
