He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize