Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
