Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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