She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
