Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
