Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
