I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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