piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
