Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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