Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
