Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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