At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Randomize
