when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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