We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
