this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
your like the ambassador to my penis.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
