I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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