I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
