we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
