Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
