I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
