I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
