belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
