I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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