i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
where are you?
Hypothermia
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
