Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
