dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
