Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
