i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
my mouth tastes like poor choices
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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