Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize