I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
