why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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