you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
