i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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