he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
