There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
