I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Randomize
