No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
