just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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