therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
