I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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