wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
