How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
