What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
