remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
