You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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