i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
