Your tits are I can't wait for
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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