Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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